My first English text 🇺🇸

There is something in the American Culture that always catches me, but I was (and am) never sure about what it is.

I’m not sure if it is the sparkles in the eyes for their way of living and believing in work, production, productivity, and so on. Or even the way of thinking and imagining things. Or, perhaps, it’s just the American dream itself.

It’s weird for me, a Brazilian, 100% left-oriented, who doesn’t believe in meritocracy and it’s going to the opposite path of mass consumption; to get - mind me saying - amazed by the way they just… exist. Or do, think, and make things.

Don’t get me wrong: I’m not stupid. There are poverty, difficulties, problems, racism, sexism, and a hundred of problems there. Their “way of life” is far from being a dream, to be honest. I believe that what really gets me is just the belief itself.

There is something in the way they believe that is captivating, almost intoxicating. And of course, coming from a 3rd world country, the facility that some of them have access to things blows my mind (imagine myself going to Disney World every year????).

Sometimes I feel like I want to taste that, just a little bit. I could feel some drops when I was in California last year, and it is really exciting, I got to say it. However, I couldn’t blind myself (as I see most of them being blind) to everything else that happens everywhere all the time. I could never disconnect from who I am and where I came from.

But, again, this I believe is a “me” problem, because I believe that my place is the world, and the world is home. Not a city, not a construction. Is that too crazy?

I’m not even sure why I decided to write that all in English. It just felt right this time. I have this idea that when you are multilingual, you can express different versions of yourself too, and that’s what happened here. This different Marina, which is not the one that feels and says in Portuguese, Spanish, or German, took over today. For the first time.

I’m not sure if I’ve never let her speak, or I just didn’t listen, or she was just too quiet. I believe, this is the year to discover all of the Marinas I am and can be (or most of them).

A picture of me enjoying the American dream back in May 2023.